Make a left- NOW!

December 27, 2009 at 10:32 am Leave a comment

When my mom began school, her teacher tied her left hand behind her back to stop her from using it. Fortunately, I was born in a more tolerant time and grabbing things with the ‘wrong’ hand was no longer punishable by binding.

However, the tendency to be ‘left’ anything still has the same negative connotations it did in my mother’s time.

Handedness is an inherited trait, according to the most recent study, just like sexual preference, but prejudice against left-handers is so rampant that everything out of whack is named after us.

Chief among these is political preference, carried on no gene but treated with the same kind of ignorance.

It’s not “right,” it’s not correct, it’s different, it’s chaotic, it’s not what most people think, it would mean restructuring everything in our lives (of course, in the case of doorknobs and scissors I would welcome this.)

It’s time to take back the word ‘left’ from people who use it as a slur. Just as gays took back the word queer, lefties can do the same by using the word ad infinitum. Problem is, they’re too pussy to do so. They’ve caved in to those on the ‘right’ who’ve co-opted the word ‘left’ to define something dark and evil that will somehow affect ‘the children.’

‘Progressive’ just doesn’t have the same history and gravitas. It says “we’re moving forward but we don’t know where and by the way, thanks for the ceramic composting crock from Plow and Hearth.

It’s also time to be thankful for what we’ve got. When Bush was in office, his right-wing minions (they’re not afraid to call themselves ‘right’ whether or not they actually are) supported him to the hilt, no matter what insipid or dangerous crap he pulled.

But the left’s support for Obama (a left-hander, BTW)  continues to be in free-fall with each decision he makes that isn’t exactly to their liking. So they’re going to abandon Obama in 2012 and nominate another overly-intellectual ball-less wimp like John Kerry who has a snowball’s chance in hell of being nominated because he’s too scared to slay the dragon. Then we’re back where we started- with a total dipshit for president.

So whatever the hell you call yourselves, be it liberal, left, or radical, say it and be it proudly. But don’t kill the goose that laid the golden egg, the messenger, or anyone else on the side of some kind of reform with an IQ over 100. Or I’m going to call you idiot.

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Let’s get the band back together Joy of Duct Tape

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Roberta Gale

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